“..when it comes to talking about our souls, yours has a halo that can’t be ignored.”, she said to me.
December 2014, Bangalore
I called dibs on the better room in the flat where I was going to move in. I was supposed to share a bathroom with a stranger, for what I thought would be a really long time. I was concerned about it but I also knew that I can adjust. I just wanted a happy place so I could move out of my PG.
Feb 2018, Bangalore
Little did I know that I will find my happy place in form of a person. I didn’t know I would end up loving this stranger so much that we would always be in each other’s rooms. That 15 months of living together would seem like such a short time. I didn’t know I was capable of coexisting with someone without sacrificing it all, without being frustrated. I didn’t know that she would be my go to person, my therapist, my knowledge bank, my closest friend and the list is never ending.
My go to person
I moved out of that beautiful flat which had become our home after a year. 2 years and a couple of personal disasters later, I felt like I don’t have a place in this world. That’s when she took me in. She had a place in her new home for me, she always had a place in her life for me.
My knowledge bank
I learn so much from her everytime we speak. On most days, she tells me about things she read in a book, be it about artificial intelligence or the bond between plants and humans. On days of self doubt I learn that I am amazing, beautiful and a strong person.
My Therapist
I always had issues with trying to look good. I had a mental block because all my life I had heard that I need to do make up or dress up or wear earings because girls do it, because I’m dark and by trying hard, I’ll be able to impress some boy or his family I’ll get married into. I did not want to be one of those girls and I did not want to impress anyone. So I did the exact opposite, neglected my body, didn’t take care of myself, my skin, my looks and the way I carry myself.
Then I saw her, being in love with herself. She did all those things because it made her happy. She pressurized me into dressing up and wearing earings. But what she also did subtly at a subconscious level was to make me realize that I can take care of myself, for myself. Instead of trying so hard to not impress others, just try a little bit to make your own life better. And suddenly one day my life was not all about protesting against something, my life was about me.
Halo of my soul
In short, she sees this halo so clearly, because she’s it. She makes me feel special on days when I feel irrelevant in this world and on days when I’m already feeling special. She is able.to do that because her soul is special. She’s the constant in my life, she’s a keeper.
Love you woman 💝
lekhikaonthego 